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my content on this site fucking sucks because I feel no pressure to actually make anything remotely good

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@citrustwee The accumulated boosts of all their birthdays will foam up about their waists and all the bofa users and discourse lovers will look up and shout "Save us!"... and I'll look down and whisper "It's my birthday. Can I get some boosts? ^-^"

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My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard and they're like "wow this is delicious and affordable" and I'm like "thank you for supporting my small independent business"

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So now I'm here, it's time to bring ratsposting to Mastodon.

RATS

RATS

WE ARE THE RATS

CELEBRATE ANOTHER ONE, A BIRTHDAY BASH

{michael} IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY TODAY, CAKE AND ICE CREAM IS ON ITS WAY

AND {michael} YOU'VE BEEN SUCH A GOOD BOY THIS YEAR, OPEN UP YOUR GIFTS WHILE WE ALL CHEER

Honestly there will never be a diss track so legendary as You're A mean One, Mr. Grinch

couple selfie, eye contact Show more

work stuff Show more

honestly though, mastodon instances are run and moderated by real people who care about the network, to the point of often paying their own money out-of-pocket to run their instances.

the *one* time i've had to report a post, my instance admin messaged me directly to let me know the action taken about it.

don't be shy to report. it works here. the rules aren't there just to keep things advertiser-friendly.

welcome to mastodon. don't be a dick. hug your local mods/admins.

work, mental health, all kinds of shit idk (---) (pt5) Show more

work, mental health, all kinds of shit idk (---) (pt4) Show more

work, mental health, all kinds of shit idk (-) (pt3) Show more

work, mental health, all kinds of shit idk (-) (pt2) Show more

work, mental health, all kinds of shit idk (-) Show more

Have the best day you can today. I'm proud of you 💜

lewd-adj pun Show more

It's been

One wheat since you looked at me

Using crops for timing is a little twee

selfie, eye contact, boosts ok Show more

@addamschloe pictured: chloe's best friend/partner (left) watching chloe in her soft jelly element: gph.is/XH0RGQ

does anybody else ever just want to commit a crime that's harmless but still serious enough to lead to a prison sentence? I just want to see what it's like

here I am with toilet sock. a sock found in our toilet, that was promptly launched into the street at 1am

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uwu

A smol instance for friends who still say "uwu". Soft and kind social space.